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Thursdays Joke


Rikos
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A man walks into a bar one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer. "Certainly, sir, that'll be 1 cent." "ONE CENT!" exclaimed the guy; the barman replied, "Yes." So the guy glances over at the menu, and he asks, "Could I have a nice juicy T-bone steak, with chips, peas, and a fried egg?" "Certainly sir," replies the bartender, but all that comes to real money." How much money?" inquires the guy. "4 cents", he replies. "FOUR cents!" exclaims the guy. "Where's the Guy who owns this place?" The barman replies, "Upstairs with my wife." The guy says, "What's he doing with your wife?" The bartender replies, "The same thing I'm doing to his business."

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A guy stood over his tee shot for a long time, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. All this was driving his golfing partner nuts. Finally, his exasperated partner said, "Just hit the stupid ball!" The guy answered, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot." "Forget it, man," said the partner. "There's no way you can hit her from here."

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A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, ''If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow I'd be a little bull.'' The driver starts getting mad at the noisy kid, who continues with, ''If my dad was an elephant and my mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant.'' The kid goes on with several animals until the bus driver gets angry and yells at the kid, ''What if your dad was !Removed! and your mom was a prostitute?!'' The kid smiles and says, ''I would be a bus driver!''

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A man walks into a store to buy a Barbie doll for his daughter. "How much is

that Barbie in the window?", he asks the shop assistant.

The assistant replies, "Which Barbie? We have Barbie Goes to the Gym for

£25.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for £25.95, Barbie Goes Shopping for £25.95,

Barbie Goes to the Beach for £25.95, and Divorced Barbie for £495.00"

The guy asks, "Why is Divorced Barbie different from all the others ?

"That's obvious," the assistant says, "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's

house, Ken's car, Ken's boat, Ken's furniture..."

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