Line Between Tolerance And Violence..

[Ianb]

Had an interesting conversation earlier and it really got me thinking about the line between the two views or actions or w/e you want to call them...

I know a lot of people who are very forgiving of anything/everything. I try to be forgiving, but I don't think I'm brilliant at it, it takes me some time - I'm in control of my aggression in day to day life, as I can wait until I'm out of ear shot and vent to myself, or walk away to calm down.. So I wouldn't call myself overly tolerant, however I can fake tolerance until the real thing kicks in, in order to keep the peace...

But some people can't, take the poor gent stabbed to death due to apparent road rage... (what possessed someone to think they'd ever have a life after stabbing someone like that is beyond me...)

But then, going back, I can indeed fake tolerance (I guess others can), but keep pushing people or don't let them 'walk away' and suddenly they can go from 'apparent tolerance, to obvious violence'....

It makes me concerned about our country on a whole, are we violent or tolerant...and if we're tolerant, will we snap? Will the snap be overly unpleasant, should we have ditched tolerance and remained semi aggressive, that way reactions wouldn't be overreactions?

I can think of many small and large subjects that the above applies to; to name a few:

Religious extremism, this could boil over and affect non extremists.

Immigration - look at how nasty Russia has become towards immigrants or even just foreign students.

Criminals reoffending, when do we say enough is enough?

Mid: read about a holocaust survivor who met this latest convicted

!potato! and forgave him because she believes more can be achieved with forgiveness, not anger.

Smaller scales are in our own personal lives:

Work? Colleagues? Driving (Road rage)? Customer services?

Anyway, my brains having a wonder around and that's the road map...

[Marks12]

Your right I'd say I have a good tolerance level but I do like everyone else have a line which once crossed there is no going back and the reaction can be brutal at best take this as an example.

3 years ago when my brother and me was still living in my mams house he would always be at me about cleaning the house hoovering and what not yet I hoovered every day and he did it once every blue moon. He even went back to my mam moaning that I done this and I done that whilst mark sat on his back side all day yet that was the day the blue moon came out so one night I had had enough he was having a few drinks and he was making a sandwich I asked him nicely to make sure he cleaned up after himself and hr turned and shouted at me saying he always cleans up after himself and me he said I shouted back called him a liar which he raised the knife he had in his hand and shouted at me again and again so he eventually squared up with me which crossed that line I pushed him back and be swung at me needless to say he couldn't open his eyes after that fight. In a way I do regret my actions but he was at me for weeks and I finally snapped he came out worse

[jeebowhite]

I think everyone has a line but tolerance is the best thing. I tend to think outside of my house (when kids are not driving me mad) my tolerance levels are normally exceptionally high but I have surprised a fair few people by bearing my teeth...

[Ianb]

Good point on the teeth front, reminds me of dogs and how hard they work to ask people to stop, before they finally snap. I wonder if our society needs to take a similar stance. Dogs with move, growl, show teeth, air snap all before actually biting, whereas I believe we all tend to just stay in the 'move' section until it goes to far, people haven't got that warning quite as much. As individuals we often tend to go through those processes, but as a collection i dont think we do..

[WES180]

my tolerance levels are normally exceptionally high but I have surprised a fair few people by bearing my teeth...

Like this - :D?

[jeebowhite]

Haha, not quite

[welshpete]

Agree with the sentiments voiced here...as for myself, I have a massive amount of tolerance and forgiveness, along with the way my Dad brought me up...Everyone gets two chances with me, one, because they don't know me or what I am capable of, (ex forces and highly trained/skilled in unarmed combat0, and two, because EVERYONE makes mistakes...

If the other party chooses to disregard the warnings I give as a matter of course, then I refuse to be held accountable for the outcome of the repercussions.

Don't get me wrong, I am NOT one for mindless violence or aggression, I go out of my way to avoid trouble and keep myself to myself and try to avoid eye contact with aggressive oafs,but, given the way I am built and my years of military training, (along with my Aikido black belt), I am more than capable of putting an end to any errr, shall we say rowdy issues lol.

Having said all that, I would much sooner walk away from aggro than get involved with it.

[jeebowhite]

Wish I could learn such skills

[WES180]

Wish I could learn such skills

Me too, only have karate clubs near me, no aikido! Ive always fancied learning some Steven Segal skills!:D

[Ianb]

Me too, only have karate clubs near me, no aikido! Ive always fancied learning some Steven Segal skills!:D

Join karate, I did it for (at a quick guess) near 10 years (maybe less) became a black belt then rugby took over (training was the same nights) and I gave it up sadly, I think perhaps it was rugby and the feeling of "I've got to black belt, I'm done" even though there are further stages.. Might look at starting it up again as aside from progressing further it actually is extremely good for your mind, discipline, flexibility etc....

Very interesting though as through the years a number of people joined and subsequently quit as they wanted to learn how to "be 'ard" and found out that when they got too big for their boots they got knocked by very easily...

[jeebowhite]

Karate is self defence not offence as my instructor used to say. I learned a bit as a child but never put it in practice, I gained 3 belts but can't remember a dang thing now.

[welshpete]

You may not remember consciously, but when it comes down to it, you will be surprised how much you actually WILL remember.

The human brain has an amazing capacity for retaining knowledge at subconcious levels....

[Ianb]

Agree with that, blocking has come in immensely handy over the years...

[jeebowhite]

Might watch a few videos and see if I can recall ugh of it lol.

Wonder how many people have learned martial arts from tinterweb

[Ianb]

Might watch a few videos and see if I can recall ugh of it lol.

Wonder how many people have learned martial arts from tinterweb

Nothing beats proper training...

[jeebowhite]

Yeah, I'm not built well at all, but I don't tend to get into confrontation, though I wish I could afford the training lol

[Stoney871]

The best way to defend yourself against a stronger person is to use their own strength against them (I learned that from Judo).

Nowadays I find a good pressure point hold works wonders, grab someones hand correctly with index finger and thumb and you can make them do anything you want.

I have quite a quick and fiery temper but years of experience has taught me to be patient and overide the temptation to belt someone.

If I were to clobber every goon that annoys me nowadays I'd be out of a job.

It's very hard to reign it in with some bellpiece screaming and spitting in your face because you have arrested them though.

[WES180]

Join karate, I did it for (at a quick guess) near 10 years (maybe less) became a black belt then rugby took over (training was the same nights) and I gave it up sadly, I think perhaps it was rugby and the feeling of "I've got to black belt, I'm done" even though there are further stages.. Might look at starting it up again as aside from progressing further it actually is extremely good for your mind, discipline, flexibility etc....

Very interesting though as through the years a number of people joined and subsequently quit as they wanted to learn how to "be 'ard" and found out that when they got too big for their boots they got knocked by very easily...

Unfortunately i cant do non contact, I have slack joints so the hyper extension of punching fresh air is actually painful.:(

Aikido looks more interesting to me. I tried Jujitsu but the back drops were leaving me with lower back pain because im 6ft 5 1/2 so its a long way down! That plus the fact im around 19 stone too. Funnily enough another instructor said he wouldnt have had me doing the repetitive back drops due to my size.

[jeebowhite]

The best way to defend yourself against a stronger person is to use their own strength against them (I learned that from Judo).

Nowadays I find a good pressure point hold works wonders, grab someones hand correctly with index finger and thumb and you can make them do anything you want.

I have quite a quick and fiery temper but years of experience has taught me to be patient and overide the temptation to belt someone.

If I were to clobber every goon that annoys me nowadays I'd be out of a job.

It's very hard to reign it in with some bellpiece screaming and spitting in your face because you have arrested them though.

If you did that I recon Devon would have the lowest crime rates of the country... Sad thing is that goons keep reoffending because they don't learn there lesson cos no one had the nads to stop them in their opinion. If only they could be brought down...

Think I have been watching too much life on Mars lol

[welshpete]

Dead right, I trained for 4 years to get my belt, and continued and extended my knowledge during 71/2 years in the army, I also gained a vast amount of knowledge/skills/training in unarmed combat, all of which helped me during my service and continues to do so.

Having said that, even with all the training and martial arts skills, the most effective of the lot was, and remains, the dirty, knockdown and drag 'em out, get in first,hard and deadly fast street fighting type with a few well placed 2extra2 moves thrown in.....a hard elbow to the head quickly entices anyone to lose interest in the proceedings, having the advantage of an elbow being harder than a fist, and won't break.......may sound vicious, but iif someone is trying to put me down, believe they are not going to have an easy time of it.....LOL

[Ianb]

Elbow is something like 'empi' in Japanese my memory fails me a smidge but something like that I'm sure...

Best thing my instructor taught us was to keep out if trouble, avoid any fights, run if necessary, last resort fight...

There's been a few high ranked karate folk that have been killed by intervening in a fight and have ended up stabbed, bottled etc... You never know how crazy or far someone is willing to go...

[jeebowhite]

Sadly right Ian, the days of an 'honest knuckle fight' are long gone. Weapons are sadly the new minimum requirement.

[Ianb]

Going full circle, look at that poor old bloke stabbed in that road rage thing a week or so ago... Honestly it's ridiculous... I had someone pull out as I was just next to them I didn't brake as there was no time, but I swerved and beeped and they still kept coming, I think they turned into a road and did a u turn to come back out, so they entered my road at an angle (like joining a slip road). As soon as I was past I stopped and I could see they stopped. My blood was boiling at how bad their driving was, but they obviously made a mistake and I gestured that they look in their mirrors next time!!!

I was thinking, Yeh that is a scenario I can see someone in my position getting out and questioning someone's ability, maybe they argue back, tell me to eff off and that it's my fault, I shove them, they shove me and I swing a punch....

That is; in my eyes, how things can potentially play out, however that's it... I could get arrested, but shortly I'd be back on my way living my life thinking that was silly...

Or let's say the guy falls after the punch, hits his head and dies, again, arrested, possibly jailed for a period of time but with the courts recognising that it was not intentional, eventually back out, live my life with some guilt... But to pick up a knife... There is no way back..ever... It's beyond me..