Have a laugh

[Rondy]

A little paper bag was feeling unwell, so he took himself off to the doctors.
'Doctor, I don't feel too good,' said the little paper bag.
'Hmm, you look OK to me,' said the Doctor, 'but I'll do a blood test and see what that shows, come back and see me in a couple of days.'

The little paper bag felt no better when he went back for the results.

'What's wrong with me?' asked the little paper bag.
'I'm afraid you are HIV positive!' said the doctor.
'No, I can't be - I'm just a little paper bag!' Said the little paper bag.
'Have you been having unprotected s*x?' asked the doctor.
'No, I can't do things like that - I'm just a little paper bag!'
'Well have you been sharing needles with other Intravenous drug users?' asked the doctor.
'No, I can't do things like that - I'm just a little paper bag!'
'Perhaps you've been abroad recently and required a jab or a blood transfusion?' queried the doctor.
'No, I don't have a passport - I'm just a little paper bag!'
'Well', said the doctor, 'are you in a homosexual relationship?'
'No! I told you I can't do things like that, I'm just a little paper bag!'
'Then there can be only one explanation.' said the doctor

SCROLL DOWN


This is good - wait for it .... .... .... ....... ....

'Your mother must have been a carrier' 

[Rondy]

A disillusioned plumber decided to leave his wife Florence but didn't have the courage to tell her to her face.

So he decided to leave her a note.

She came down in the morning to find it on the kitchen table.

It simply read. It's over Flo.😄

[Rondy]

Son: "Dad, there is someone at the door to collect donations for a community swimming pool."
Father: "Okay, give him a glass of water."

[dezwez]

2 hours ago, Rondy said:

Son: "Dad, there is someone at the door to collect donations for a community swimming pool."
Father: "Okay, give him a glass of water."

lol🙂

[Rondy]

Patient: "Doctor, I have a little man in my head, and he's cursing all the time!"
Doctor: "Well, this problem is really easy to fix! It will cost you £1000."
Patient: "Doctor, do you want to know what the little guy just said?"

[dezwez]

1 hour ago, Rondy said:

Patient: "Doctor, I have a little man in my head, and he's cursing all the time!"
Doctor: "Well, this problem is really easy to fix! It will cost you £1000."
Patient: "Doctor, do you want to know what the little guy just said?"

LOL

[eddie eastwood]

Could relate to a few members.

[dezwez]

1 hour ago, eddie eastwood said:

Could relate to a few members.

lol

[Rondy]

 

I  saw a guy with one arm, shopping in a second hand store, I couldn't resist and just had to say to him "I don't think your going to find what you are looking for here."

[Rondy]

After a long night of making love, the guy notices a photo of another man, on the woman's nightstand by the bed.
He begins to worry.
'Is this your husband?' he nervously asks.
'No, silly,' she replies, snuggling up to him.
'Your boyfriend, then?' he continues.
'No, not at all,' she says, nibbling away at his ear.
'Is it your dad or your brother?' he inquires, hoping to be reassured.
'No, no, no! You are so hot when you're jealous!' she answers.
'Well, who in the hell is he, then?' he demands.
She whispers in his ear
'That's me before the surgery.' ...

[Rondy]

The police recently arrested a man selling "secret formula" tablets he claimed gave eternal youth.
When going through their files they noticed it was the fifth time he was caught for committing this same criminal medical fraud.
He had earlier been arrested in 1794, 1856, 1928 and 1983....

[eddie eastwood]

[eddie eastwood]

[eddie eastwood]

[dezwez]

On 6/5/2021 at 9:34 AM, Rondy said:

After a long night of making love, the guy notices a photo of another man, on the woman's nightstand by the bed.
He begins to worry.
'Is this your husband?' he nervously asks.
'No, silly,' she replies, snuggling up to him.
'Your boyfriend, then?' he continues.
'No, not at all,' she says, nibbling away at his ear.
'Is it your dad or your brother?' he inquires, hoping to be reassured.
'No, no, no! You are so hot when you're jealous!' she answers.
'Well, who in the hell is he, then?' he demands.
She whispers in his ear
'That's me before the surgery.' ...

🤣

[dezwez]

4 hours ago, Rondy said:

The police recently arrested a man selling "secret formula" tablets he claimed gave eternal youth.
When going through their files they noticed it was the fifth time he was caught for committing this same criminal medical fraud.
He had earlier been arrested in 1794, 1856, 1928 and 1983....

😂

[dezwez]

2 hours ago, eddie eastwood said:

😂

[Marty...]

[Ian Lanc]

[Ian Lanc]

If IKEA sold MTB's 🤣😂🤣😂

[dezwez]

3 hours ago, Marty... said:

😂

[dezwez]

34 minutes ago, Ian Lanc said:

😂

[Rondy]

Because of a shortage of maids, the minister's wife advertised for a manservant. The next morning a nicely dressed young man came to the front door.
"Can you start the breakfast by seven o'clock?" asked the minister.
"I guess so," answered the man.
"Can you polish all the silver, wash all the dishes, do the laundry, take care of the lawn, wash windows, iron clothes and keep the house neat and tidy?"
"Say, vicar," said the young fellow rather meekly, "I came here to see about getting married - but if you expect me to do that much work, you can count me out right now."

[dezwez]

2 hours ago, Rondy said:

Because of a shortage of maids, the minister's wife advertised for a manservant. The next morning a nicely dressed young man came to the front door.
"Can you start the breakfast by seven o'clock?" asked the minister.
"I guess so," answered the man.
"Can you polish all the silver, wash all the dishes, do the laundry, take care of the lawn, wash windows, iron clothes and keep the house neat and tidy?"
"Say, vicar," said the young fellow rather meekly, "I came here to see about getting married - but if you expect me to do that much work, you can count me out right now."

Lol

[Marty...]