I don't see why motorways are any different to dual carriageways in terms of skill?

There aren't any motorways in Suffolk so I've only ever driven on one in over 5 years...didn't see what the fuss was about tbh lol. We have some 3 lane dual carriageways locally (that doesn't sound right haha) so it's the same size and speed as that, just with blue signs instead of green ones... Only thing I noticed was how smoooooth the road surface was, far superior than the dually's I'm used to!

That's only 4 venues ruled out . . . . . use your imagination . . . . :)

Can't do it in the shower as I'm to tall and she's to small apparently (6ft 2" and 5ft 4 or 6"). Don't do it on the sofa because if we shut the dog in the kitchen he sits and watches, I'm all for voyeurism but I'll draw the line at the dog, In the car is totally out of bounds as is daylight, can't do it at the farm either as it's to dirty apparently. Sigh :(

Let the dog roam free, although he might get in the way, from time to time - but it's all part of life rich pageant etc.

Brandy has experience of getting in the way, requesting the loo, at some of most inconvenient times etc

I don't see why motorways are any different to dual carriageways in terms of skill?

There aren't any motorways in Suffolk so I've only ever driven on one in over 5 years...didn't see what the fuss was about tbh lol. We have some 3 lane dual carriageways locally (that doesn't sound right haha) so it's the same size and speed as that, just with blue signs instead of green ones... Only thing I noticed was how smoooooth the road surface was, far superior than the dually's I'm used to!

3 lane dual carriageway should be a trial carriageway, in theory :P

Not all dual carriageways are 70 zones, I know a few that are 20 zones & there are many differences between dual carriageways & motorways . . . traffic lights . . . zebra crossings . . . junctions, roundabouts that don't necessitate leaving the motorway per se, etc , etc

If we let the dog roam free, he tries to intercept lol. Don't fancy slipping and going into one of his orifices lol. He's very much a daddies dog. I have however done it in the tractor, however I no longer drive the tractor. Anyone got any other venue suggestions, don't forget I'm going out with a fridge

Take her to Iceland . . . . should feel at ease there . . . :)

Slam in the lamb down the aisles . . . . :)

HAhahahahaha Iceland, love it.

Not all dual carriageways are 70 zones, I know a few that are 20 zones & there are many differences between dual carriageways & motorways . . . traffic lights . . . zebra crossings . . . junctions, roundabouts that don't necessitate leaving the motorway per se, etc , etc

That's fair enough then. I'm used to the A12 and A14, both of which are basically the same as motorways, I just assumed there were major roads like that everywhere that could mimic motorways for learners.

If we let the dog roam free, he tries to intercept lol. Don't fancy slipping and going into one of his orifices lol. He's very much a daddies dog. I have however done it in the tractor, however I no longer drive the tractor. Anyone got any other venue suggestions, don't forget I'm going out with a fridge

Refrigerated Trailer?

Milk Bowser?

Currys/PC World in the home appliance aisle.

In an old chest freezer with door open, obviously

Could send her my way Matt... Some of us aren't into anything physical or involving bodily fluids (yeah, I'm kinda weird). She sounds ideal to me... ;)

Use the resources around you.

Get all the cows to stand in a big deep circle, like a large dairy polo mint. The cow shield now blocks the voyeuristic dog view, or indeed access to Daddy

Arrange cushions for you and her, in the hole, and get busy

Could send her my way Matt... Some of us aren't into anything physical or involving bodily fluids (yeah, I'm kinda weird). She sounds ideal to me... ;)

What do you then, look at each other??? I'll have to send a brown bag lol. As for your comment GMX, I'll just go to work, we have a rotary parlour, I'll get some straw and put the night lights and smooth radio on, that should set the boat sailing.

I don't like being a horny 23 year old and being engaged to a popular brand of fridge. Worst bit is I'm getting married in April, does it totally disappear when I'm married. Can someone help me? My bed has seen more action in a cbeebies night time story

I used to have a Frigidaire... The actual fridge, that is

Although, there was a time when "it" didn't start until after marriage. Different these days though...

Hayloft ?

Christmas Tree Acclimatisation Therapy for the younger cat :P

Well after attacking it a bit he's calmed down.

Yes I know it's a tiny tree, no we haven't decorated it yet, and yes I need to clear up the bits he ripped off. :P

Well after attacking it a bit he's calmed down.

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Yes I know it's a tiny tree, no we haven't decorated it yet, and yes I need to clear up the bits he ripped off. :P

By the look in his eyes he still has a bit more attacking planned, but is just waiting for the right moment...

I used to have a Frigidaire... The actual fridge, that is

Although, there was a time when "it" didn't start until after marriage. Different these days though...

Another fridge brand is Smeg ;)

Try getting 'jiggy' with 3 dogs in the house and bear in mind that one of those is trained to protect me.

Barking and snarling is a mood breaker :(

Thank god for crates :)

I don't agree with the s*x before marriage. You don't buy a car before test driving it do you lol.

I did plenty of test driving as a lad :d

On the topic of motorway training, I learnt to drive in North Devon, we don't have a motorway there either. After my test, I did pass plus, my instructor and I were out for the day, drove down the A361 down to the M5, up and down part of that, into Exeter for some crazy city driving (N Devon doesn't have a city either), then back cross country, it was a long day driving, knackering as I couldn't slouch or just follow the road, I had to concentrate like on a test. However, it not only subconsciously benefitted me, it also helped me financially with insurance etc. I think it's important, but I would hesitate and say I am one that believes there should be curfews for younger drivers, perhaps even occupancy limits. Yeh, sure we've all heard about those crashes with 10 people in a corsa etc, and you'll never stop a clown from trying to kill themselves, but limiting those who die or kill others through inexperience is probably the goal here.

Maybe a protective dog could come in handy if your married to a nympho lol, especially if they mark your back. Wish I was, I have however been offered round for a 'coffee' by a milf, who was a nympho. But I was brought up to respect my women...... You dirty old dog, test driving, I'm still with my original cough for lack of a better term, model

I don't agree with the s*x before marriage. You don't buy a car before test driving it do you lol.

True, but you also only keep a car for around 5 years before getting rid and replacing it. Not saying that modern marriages only last as long as a car, but you catch my drift...

Mind you, I'm not one to take advice from, considering a chat in the smoking shelter is the closest I get to any females.

And no, that's not a euphemism

I don't like the fact my car appears to have become invisible this morning... (Lights were on haha).

1. Old lady looks directly at my car a few yards away and decides to cross anyway

2. Lorry doing 50mph in the left lane, me doing 70 on cruise control in the fast lane about to overtake him, his indictator flashes once and he pulls straight across in front forcing me to brake and pull into the empty left hand lane

3. At a 4 way junction, I and a car opposite both indicating to turn the same way, right for me so technically he has right of way but I'd reached the junction first and he waited for so long I thought he was letting me go...then pulls out as my front bumper comes level with his, que another evasive manoeuvre!

4. On a large 3 lane roundabout, I'm in the middle lane to pull onto the fast lane of the dually, Astra in the slow outer lane drifts across into my lane with no indication - admittedly at this point I got annoyed and booted it across the 3rd lane and back in front of him lol.

5. Get back to our large empty car park...to find a courier van parked diagonally across the corner of the roadway so I had to scuff a bush slightly to get past.

Honestly I'm not sure if I'm being a 'donkey' or if other people are just completely lacking consideration or observation today!

Sounds like you've still got your invisibility cloak on mate

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